2020: week 1...

I'm not sure what I think of 'mindfulness' in the way it seems to have become a mantra for survival. But maybe thats because I have the concentration span of a gnat and am easily distracted. However, I do think there is something to be said for noticing the small stuff and trying to get life in some kind of perspective. And to be honest, it was one of the things I first thought was helpful about Blogland - yes, there are certainly some sites where life appears to be a bit idyllic but a) we all have a choice about what we choose to read and b) maybe a bit of reflection on what gives pleasure in our own lives helps us to realise some balance. I am a bit of an 'over thinker' with a definite tendency to anxiety and it is very easy to become dragged down by life and worries. So...this year I have resolved to take a photo a day - however small a thing. Of course I have already taken more than one a day! But I am also resolving to be disciplined and just select one that represents something that gave me a lift or made me feel more hopeful. I may not manage it but I will give it a go!

1st January:

A long walk on New Year's Day, snowdrops out already! This makes me feel optimistic about longer, brighter days and I'm trying not to think that our warming planet might be resulting in the early blooms!

2nd January:

I started practising yoga again a couple of months ago. Did it years ago but changes in working commitments made it impossible to keep the class up. Then recently I came across a series of videos that have re-sparked my enthusiasm. And I haven't missed a day since. I think it allows me some escape time when I have to concentrate on what I'm doing. Or fall over! And already I am sure I am stronger, with better balance, if still a long way to go in the flexibility stakes! Enjoying using my daisy blanket again too.

3rd January:

I was lucky to get lots of books at Christmas. Enjoying escaping into the pages of this gentle, reflective prose at night time. 

4th January:

Sweet peas planted in my cold frame. Mum loved sweet peas and I am hoping to have fragrant flowers all summer. Painted Lade and King Edward VII. Fingers crossed.

5th January:

My parents led a complicated life. Which resulted in Mum spending many of her last weeks and months with Dad absent. Some of my father's behaviour I struggle to forgive. But then I remind myself that Mum always forgave him everything - I think she was one of the few people I knew who loved unconditionally. And when he arrived back, she always made cake. So I went to the house and baked in her kitchen and left cake for him to come home to.

6th January:

Last year I started a 'temperature blanket' with colours assigned to the highest and lowest recorded temperatures each day. I began with double crochet stripes but realised by mid February that 730 rows was going to make a blanket big enough to carpet my living room! I sort of lost interest and then other stuff took over but I was quite fascinated by tracking the weather all year and slightly surprised by how mild 2019 was in Norwich. Less than 25 sub zero nights and mild high teens days in February and October. Having accumulated a lot of yarn for the blanket, seemed a shame not to complete it. So I have started again, with these little squares, one for each day with the centre two rounds the low temperature of the day and the outer round the highest. We'll see how it pans out. But quite enjoying getting my hook out again.

7th January:

A rainbow notebook to jot down random thoughts at bed time - trying to empty my head of unhelpful thoughts that have a habit of keeping me awake at night. Underneath is a blanket Mum made. She started it many years ago when she had a brass bedstead. She had almost finished it other than a very flouncy border fit for a 1980s bedroom! When she was so ill in the summer she found it and I promised I would finish it for her. I did try the border but it was really not my thing and when Mum died, I decided it would be better to add a simpler border and use the blanket that finish as intended and not like the look of it on my bed. Although plain cream is not usually my thing, it is actually quite restful and I am glad it is in use after all these years. Hope Mum would approve.

8th January:

Mum had a massive plant - she called it a 'Tree of happiness' though I think more usually it is called a 'Money Tree'. It was huge and very healthy. It must have been 50 years old - I can't remember it not being there and we were determined to save it from my Dad's neglect. But within a few weeks it was reduced to a shrivelled trunk and a handful of leaves. I rescued the leaves and potted them up, hoping to salvage the 'daughters' of the original for myself and my sisters. One is finally sending up new leaves and I can't tell you how pleased I am with this tiny plant. Hoping the other two grow too but if not, maybe in time I can propagate from this one and we can all have a bit of Mum's plant.

Baby steps into 2020.

S x