Monday, 24 January 2011

monday blues...

Don't really know why but my slightly jaded feeling persisted today.

In spite of...

...unexpected card from R. I thought we'd agreed not to do anniversary cards in the light of the post-Christmas economy drive (and we've never been great at cards anyway) - now feel suitably guilty that I didn't reciprocate. It all just feels a bit like papering over the cracks...

But I love the bright flowers on this card.

I had a short day at work today so, on a whim as the sun was shining, decided to head to the village I grew up in and where we were married 24 years ago today.

Never a good idea. Not sure what I was hoping for... to resurrect a few feelings maybe? An indulgent trip down memory lane? But so much has changed - the village looks tired and overcrowded with extra houses built in every possible space between their neighbours. The houses I always thought of as the big 'posh' houses look a bit tatty round the edges. Even the church seemed a bit run down and unloved...

In fairness, presumably whatever is happening to the porch is intended to make it look better but today I couldn't find any happy feelings here. In fact, I just felt nothing

It was a nice bright day, so I did take a walk through the village (probably not a great idea - wretched leg sore again now) - but I don't know if it was me and my memory playing tricks, or just because the place looks so different, I really struggled to find the footpaths I used to walk on. I'm sure it used to be possible to walk alongside the railway but there seem to be houses there too.

Don't think I shall go back there. 

In an effort to find the small things that brighten life I went to the river, I have always loved the sunlight on the water.

And this did look lovely with the winter sun low in the sky.

Consider this day over, I think. Gawd help us, Silver wedding next.


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